5 Of The “Worst Songs Of All Time” That Are Actually Great

19 Mar

So I found this thing on the internet. Yes, music lovers everywhere, this list is supposedly a list of the 50 worst songs of all time ever. The people who made this list are actually an embarrassment to list-makers everywhere. We know that these songs are not the 50 worst of all time for two reasons. First off, Journey and Bon Jovi have both been mysteriously omitted. Second, there are several songs on here that are at least okay (Sound of Silence, We Built This City, etc) and exactly 5 songs that are actually great. They are:

48. The Beatles- Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da

This is legit in my top 5 favorite Beatles song of all time. I mean, I actually don’t even understand how a person could say this song is anything less than a 10/10. Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da is the greatest sexist song ever written (“Molly stays at home and does her pretty face”). Because life is happier when the woman’s work is just keeping herself pretty. That’s what I learned from the Beatles. This person even named their blog after this song, and it looks remarkably like a WordPress page. This person has good taste, and therefore it’s obviously a good song.

#41. Billy Joel- We Didn’t Start The Fire

Everybody knows that Billy Joel is a great musician. Well… most people know it. When people want to use words like “cheesy” to describe the musical genius of Joel, I just send them to find my friend Tess and never talk to them again. I guess I understand why this isn’t musically great, but be honest. When you hear this song, you love it. The people who made this list were just mad because they couldn’t memorize all the lyrics. Here’s some advice: you just have to sit down and write them out. Trust me, I’ve been there.

#26. The Doors- The End

I thought the Doors were generally regarded as being great musicians. I mean even snobby music people like the Doors. Right? I get that The End gets kind of weird toward the end (ha! ha! see what happened there?!) and becomes more of, like, drums while Morrison reads an unpublished Poe short story, but we can still all agree that the first three minutes are great… right?

#12. The Beach Boys- Kokomo

Okay, so let’s have a real quick moment of honesty, y’all. Pretty much everything the Beach Boys have ever written sounds very similar to, if not exactly the same as everything else the Beach Boys have ever written. If you like the Beach Boys (and I do), what’s so different about another pop number featuring shallow romance and warm beaches? What makes this song top-twelve-terrible? That’s what the Beach Boys do, for God’s sake! And Rolling Stone called Pet Sounds the second greatest album of all time. So there’s that.

#5. Vanilla Ice- Ice Ice Baby

Ice Ice Baby is so friggen classic. I mean, not just anyone whips out creative genius like ” ‘Cause my style’s like a chemical spill/ Feasible rhymes that you can invision and feel”. I mean, I don’t even know what that means and I know it’s awesome. Everybody knows it’s awesome. I know because I asked my whole entire English class, and every single person agreed that Ice Ice Baby is a great song. Every. Single. Person.


One Response to “5 Of The “Worst Songs Of All Time” That Are Actually Great”

  1. The Other Category March 19, 2013 at 9:20 pm #

    I can totally understand why people wouldn’t like the song Ice Ice Baby, (while I’m not one of those people) I would NEVER be able to understand putting it with the worst songs. That’s not okay.

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