On Chanchery

22 Nov

Chanche (chanch, chänch) n.  1. A stupid or foolish person; an idiot.  2. An object whose name cannot be remembered, or has decidedly been replaced.  3. A term or endearment  -v. chanched, –chancheing, chanches.tr. 1. To act in a foolish or stupid way. 2. To engage in any type of activity, wether active or passive. –chancheing out. To act in a loud or obnoxious manner; typically to throw things or pound on a table.  -adj. chanche, chancherous. –tr. 1. Of or relating to a person or object which has been designated as a chanche. 2. Frustrating or difficult to understand. -interj. chanches.tr. An exclamation of frustration, anger, or disdain.

A Brief History Of Chanchery

The word ‘chanche’ was invented (or was it discovered?) during Sophomore Biology when I (Shannon) had not gotten enough sleep the night before. We were doing Punnett Squares, and after I spelled ‘chance’ as ‘chanche’ three times, my sassy friend Christina said that I was a chanche. So I am. BIT of an anti-climactic story.

The Alternate Version, or The Perks of Being a Chanche

Once upon a time, there were two chanches. One was a preppy blond, the other one was a freak. As they were walking along in the beautiful country of the United States of Chanches, they happened upon a midget. The midget befriended the chanches, and spent so much time with them that she herself eventually transformed into a beautiful, slightly awkward, midget chanche. The midget chanche had another friend, a slightly less of a midget starkid. The midget chanche encouraged the starkid to join the League of Chanches. and so she did. The League of Chanches grew and grew, and more and more chanches were formed. The chanches grew very close to each other, literally and figuratively, and had a lot of fun together. They spent their chanchey time pounding and replacing words and phrases and proper nouns with chanche.

And so were invented Enchancheted, Chanche Valchanche, Chanchey Chanchey Bang Bang, The Scarlet Chanche, Great Chanchespectations, A Separate Chanche, The Great Chanchesby, Beauty and the Chanche, Tichanchetic, Chancherella (on ice), Wizards of Waverly Chanche, Chanche Farm, The Curious Chanche, Inspecting Chanche, Fiddler on the Chanche, Sweeny Chanche, Chancheing in the Rain, Chanchadoon, Chanchespell, Jesus Christ SuperChanche, Olenchanchey Boulevard, E. North Chancheway, Chancheton, Chancheland and Chancharctica.

Some other groups think the chanches are weird. Like, really, really weird. In fact most cooler groups find them weird. That’s ok. I’m pretty sure those other “cooler” groups don’t laugh as hard as the chanches at the lunch table.


3 Responses to “On Chanchery”

  1. isabrown7 November 23, 2012 at 1:15 am #

    I love you. I love is chanches. Love. Chanche. Eat, love, chanche. Kai, bai


  1. The perks of being a chanche « the awkward thoughts of awkward me - November 27, 2012

    […] weird. That’s ok. I’m pretty sure those other “cooler” groups don’t laugh as hard as the chanches at the lunch […]

  2. A letter to The Other Category « the awkward thoughts of awkward me - January 16, 2013

    […] The Chanches […]

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